Former GSE Captain Ads tells Les Murray: "You're a Bitter Cunt"

Let me jump on the bandwagon and agree with some of the lot that has been said about the Dick Advocaat betrayal and where to from here.

:: Advocaat is a scoundrel. (Come on Les now you sound like a jilted lover, I’m sure you can find someone else’s asshole to lick)

:: Australia needs now to recruit someone who is internationally experienced and respected but doesn’t see the Australian job as his cash yielding retirement gig (not at all like Guus. I hear that he has a real interest in Russian soccer not dirty dirty Abromovich roubles).

:: The new national coach must spend the bulk of his time in Australia and embrace the national ‘mission’, supervising and writing the blueprint for all our national teams, including the women (what the fuck for? Female soccer is liking watch a stripper with one leg you can’t helping watching for a bit but in the end you get bored and feel sick).

:: The Hiddink-sparked Dutch technical method and ideology, adopted by the senior Australian national teams over the past two years, must remain in place in the interests of continuity.

On the first point there is little argument and not much more needs to be said. Advocaat, a Dick by name and character, (lets not start talking about dicks Les) reneged on a word of honour (boo hoo its not the fucking 15th century either sue him for breach of contract or fuck off). Indeed Zenit must be run by buffoons if they are prepared to put under contract a man with such form, who so easily and willingly backed out on previous deals, at least twice. (Yeah they must be fucking idiots. Its not as if he broke the Moscow domination of the Russian domestic lead and took the title to the old Tsarist Capital….ooooh wait he did do that.)

I hope he walks out on them (meeeow, bitch), as he has done on the UAE and Australia, and he probably will at the first sign of crap weather, and there is plenty of that in St Petersburg (fuck you Les, now you’re just bagging a city’s weather. On that premise I don’t think anyone would manage any team in England).

On the second and third points there are surely no arguments either: Australia does need a pedigree coach but it also needs someone who believes in the grander national purpose and who is willing and able to leave a lasting legacy. No quick-buck opportunists need apply.

But the most critical, at least in the immediate sense, is the last point.

Guus Hiddink, remarkably given his short reign, turned the technical culture of our national team on its head. So deep is his imprint that our two most senior national teams, the Socceroos and the Olyroos, 17 months after his departure, insist on playing his way, the ‘Dutch’ way (what the fuck does that mean? Do the play in a red light district smoking pot and giving up and turning coat everytime they play against the Germans).

We saw this in the way the Olyroos overcame Iraq in Gosford and how the Socceroos, in a superbly impressive way, outplayed Nigeria in London.

We have gone Dutch. In both games there was crisp passing, an emphasis on ball possession, the use of wingers (the wingers were in a 4-4-2 formation dipshit. Total Football all the way with that one), sweet movement off the ball and a collective understanding. They were joyous sights and rarely, in both games, did Australia look like losing.

This is a serious legacy of Hiddink and, though he is now gone, it should not be allowed to slip. There is the evolution of a definable technical direction underway, already governing the top end of our football and it should be made to last.

And it is unmistakeably Dutch.

Australia’s technical director is Dutch (no you don’t say. With your wonderful powers of detection why are you wasting time writing articles for the world game when there are thousands of unsolved murders for you to solve. Run Les run). Rob Baan had a huge hand in laying the foundations of the recent Olyroos campaign, bringing a flowing unity to a bunch of youngsters in whom, frankly, not too many of us had much faith.

Graham Arnold, a Hiddink disciple who spent years in Holland as a player, is now continuing Baan’s work.

And it appears that Baan will also have a big hand in authoring the substance and philosophy of our grassroots development, as foreshadowed in the FFA’s recently released national development plan.

The Dutch train is steaming and has reached top speed. It would be crazy to now derail it. And a case of derailing it would be if the new man was of a different technical culture, like a German, or an Italian, a Brazilian or even a Frenchman (proof that Les Murray is a racist).

It would be a case of starting again from scratch and going back two years.(racist)

So who are the Dutchmen the FFA could or should target in the interests of continuing this Dutch semester?

There is no shortage of candidates with reasonable profiles and good credentials. And most of them are available.

The rest of this article is bullshit I have chosen to right no more about it except: Johan Cruyff are you fucking joking? Frank Rijkaard, you must be fucking joking. I can see it now:

“I would like to resign from Barcelona because I would prefer to work with Luke Wilkshire instead of Leo Messi.”

JOHAN CRUYFF
Now steady on. I am not saying the great man would come out of retirement for this gig. But his name cannot be avoided. He is the embodiment of the ‘beautiful game’, as both player and coach, and having steered Barcelona to a European Cup win and four straight Primera championships makes his choice just about unchallengeable.

Downside: Never coached a national team. Has no knowledge of Asia.

FOPPE DE HAAN
Steered Holland to two successive European Under 21 championship wins in 2006 and 2007. Took Holland into the finals of the Beijing Olympics next year. Coached SC Heerenveen between 1985 and 2004, the longest spell by any coach with a Dutch club. Took them into the Champions League in 1999. Graham Arnold is a huge fan.

Downside: Virtually unknown in Australia. Currently under contract as Holland’s Olympic coach. No experience in Asia.

WIM JANSEN
Successful former coach of Feyenoord, Glasgow Celtic, Sanfrecce Hiroshima and Urawa Reds. Coached Celtic to their first championship in ten years. Has a decent handle on Asian football through his time in Japan.

Downside: Not a ‘big name’ in Australia.

MARTIN JOL
Nicknamed Tony Soprano because of his appearance, the recently sacked Tottenham boss’ main credits are having once saved RKC Waalwijk from relegation and taking amateur ADO Den Haag from the third division to the first.

Downside: Not an impressive enough track record.

JOHAN NEESKENS
The legendary ex-team mate of Cruyff is well acquainted with the Australian players and culture, having served as one of Hiddink’s assistants. Currently in a most beneficial environment, assistant to Frank Rijkaard with probably the most admired club team in the world. Could do worse.

Downside: No track record as a senior national coach, nor any experience in Asia.

HANS OOFT
His name hasn’t surfaced in the recent bout of speculation, yet could be one of the most qualified. Coached Japan for two years in the early ‘90s when Japan won the Asian Cup for the first time and missed out tragically, by one goal, on qualifying for the 1994 World Cup (which would have been Japan’s first). Ooft, 60, was also a successful coach in the J-League, with both Jubilo Iwata and Urawa Reds. Currently in retirement, living in Holland.

Downside: Has been inactive since 2003, low profile.

FRANK RIJKAARD
Now here’s a name, but would he come? Already a European Cup winner with Barca and a European Championship semi finalist, his playing methods are the role models to which all teams should aspire, including the Socceroos.

Downside: Under contract to FC Barcelona. No experience in Asia.

PIM VERBEEK
If experience in Asia is a core essential, he could be our man. He spent many years in Korea, as assistant to both Hiddink and Advocaat and then as national coach with this year’s Asian Cup bronze medallists. He has already said he is keen and ready to come and, at 51, is among the younger of the candidates.

Downside: Considered ‘middle-tier’ in profile, probably not high enough for Frank Lowy