Magnusson pushed out of West Ham over spiraling wages tribalfootball.com - December 17, 2007 Eggert Magnusson was pushed out of West Ham United over the club's spiraling wage bill, it has been revealed.
The Sunday Mirror says Magnusson was forced out of West Ham after majority shareholder Bjorgolfur Gudmundsson launched a full-scale enquiry into the running of the club.
And it was the £110,000-aweek wages paid to Freddie Ljungberg - almost TREBLE his Arsenal deal - that sparked Gudmundsson into action.
Gudmundsson, an Icelandic banking billionaire, decided to take personal control after becoming concerned by Magnusson's increasingly high profile and some of his decision-making.
The owner had major concerns about the salaries Magnusson authorised for incoming players such as Ljungberg, Lucas Neill, Matthew Upson and Luis Boa Morte.
Ljungberg was paid around £38,000 a week by Arsenal and had been struggling with a series of injuries.
At 30 his career appeared to have reached a crossroads and the Gunners were prepared to let him move on.
And the Sweden international must have been laughing all the way to the bank when the Hammers offered him a pay packet of around £110,000 a week.
It has not helped Magnusson's justification of the deal to see Ljungberg sidelined for long spells this season.
So far he has made just eight appearances.
Lucas Neill was poised to leave Blackburn Rovers for Liverpool in last January's transfer window - until Magnusson opened the Hammers chequebook.
With the end of his contract approaching Rovers were ready to sell the tough-tackling defender for £1.5million.
Liverpool offered the Aussie £55,000 a week - only for West Ham to clinch his signature with an offer of £90,000 a week.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck
At least we killed it indoor this week cause i'm fucked.
fuck
At least we killed it indoor this week cause i'm fucked.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Dark Day: GSE Crushed in Season Opener
Last night, GSE were crushed 6-1 in the season opener vs Can Eaters Utd
With no substitutes, GSE struggled to cope with the pace of the game. A mad opening 5 minutes where 4 goals were conceded spelt the end to any sort of chance of victory. GSE played without any sort of structure with players all too often being found out of position.
New additions to the squad Ben and Zach found the going tough, though next week's game promises to be a chance for redemption with the return of two players to the line up.
Man of the Match: Ads/Chook (Ads scored the solitary goal, battled hard up front often with two Can Eaters hacking at him at once. And Chook, a top performance in goals, then a typically hard running performance, good passing, great defensive positioning when most of the side was standing up field with hands on hips ready to collapse)
AIPSC Golden Boot:
Ads 1
Next match 6pm vs Kazakhstan Utd
Team will meet at 5.30 for pre match kick about, tactical talk. 2-1-1 formation.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Futsal Rules (Somebody learn this and tell me on game day)
Knowledge of Rules
The laws of indoor soccer that apply at a venue operated by the Albert Park Indoor Sports Centre (APISC) or Beeview Sports are those of FIFA unless a rule of the Centre provides otherwise. In those cases where there is conflict between a general law and a rule of the Centre the Centre’s rule will prevail. It is the responsibility of each player to be familiar with these rules.
Duration of a Game
A game shall consist of two eighteen minute halves. Teams will change ends at half time. There will be a maximum two minute break at half time.
A game is started and finished by the referee’s whistle. Kick off is decided by the toss of a coin.
Unless APISC determines otherwise a competition will be scheduled over a 15 week season. Finals will be played over two weeks.
Fees Payment
APISC shall determine the game fees that it shall receive from time to time. The fees for a match consist of a team’s payment to APISC and a team’s payment to the referee. A team must be paid up at least ten minutes before its game is scheduled to commence. Match fees, including a team’s referee’s fees, are non-refundable.
APISC shall deduct 2 premiership points from a team’s total points if it does not pay its game fees in full on the night of a game. Points will continue to be deducted at APISC’s discretion until full payment is received.
Match fees apply any time a team plays a fixtured match or plays a scratch match.
Registration and Last Game Bond
Upon entering a competition teams shall pay a last game bond and a registration fee as determined by APISC. Both fees are non-refundable. These fees must be paid prior to the seasons’ commencement.
A registration fee is to be paid by the first game of each season, otherwise APISC shall deduct 2 points from a team’s total for each week that the fee is outstanding.
Each team must mark its participating players on the team registration card before each game.
Last Game Bond
Before it commences a season teams must pay a non-refundable last game bond fee equivalent to the team’s fees for a match. The last game bond will be used to pay match fees if a team forfeits during a season; otherwise, if a team has no forfeits, the bond will be used to pay the team’s fees in the last round of a season before the season’s finals. APISC shall deduct 2 points from a team’s total for each week that the fee is outstanding.
Outstanding Money
Any team with outstanding money owing to APISC is not eligible for finals.
Times of Games
The times at which games are fixtured shall be determined by APISC and it may vary them without notice in the event of unforeseen circumstances.
Teams are to be on court at the time fixtured for the start of their game. The clock will be started at the fixtured time to ensure that all teams can play their full game from their fixtured time. Failure to be on court at the fixtured time will result in a one goal penalty. Thereafter teams will lose one goal at three minutes and six minutes for lateness with the game being abandoned after nine minutes has elapsed. Teams who have members running late must take the court when they have the minimum of three players so that the referee can start the game.
An automatic forfeit will apply if a team is not on court within nine minutes of the fixtured start time.
Points
Teams shall be awarded 4 points for a win, 2 points for a tie and 2 points for s bye.
Teams shall lose 4 points for a loss on forfeit and 8 points for playing red card players.
Teams having a win on forfeit will only receive four points if they play an organised scratch match. No points shall be awarded if a team does not participate in a scratch match organised by APISC. If Centre management cannot organise a scratch match, the non forfeiting team shall receive four points.
Forfeit
A team will be regarded as forfeiting a match if, of its own volition, it does not play a match that APISC has scheduled for it in a competition. Forfeiting teams forfeit their last game bond. In addition, teams that forfeit on the day of scheduled play will have to pay a penalty equal to a team’s game fees if a “scratch match” cannot be organized for their opponents. A forfeiting team will have four premiership points deducted and will be required to reinstate its last game bond.
Any fees arising as penalties as a result of a forfeit must be paid prior to the start of the next fixtured game otherwise 2 points may be deducted each week until any arrears are paid.
Finals
All finals dates will be posted on the notice board. These games will not change. Finals times will be given out 2 weeks before finals commence.
A player, who may have played in more than one team in the same division, can only qualify for one team in the finals for that division.
In a 14 game draw, a player must play 5 games to qualify for finals. In a 10 game draw, a player must play 4 games to qualify. In a 6 game draw, a player must play 3 games to qualify for finals. Byes and forfeits may only count for games played if they occur after the date a player plays their first registered game. Then only a maximum of either two byes or forfeits or combination of both will be counted as games played.
The total points that it has received during the course of the competition will determine a team’s position on the ladder. If two or more teams are on the same points at the end of the season, the position on the ladder will be determined by a team’s number of wins at the end of the season. If teams have the same number of wins the ladder position will be determined by the goal difference (amount of goals scored by a team through a season less the goals scored against the team).
In finals, if there is a draw at full time, teams will play until a goal is scored with an extra 3 minutes at each end. When a goal is scored the scoring team shall be the winner. If after the six minutes extra time the score is still level, the result will be determined by a goal shoot out of five nominated team members.
Teams are allotted 7 trophies per team (Premiers and Runners Up) for the Finals Series. APISC will provide at cost more trophies if a team requires.
Teams
A team must have three players for a game to start. No more than five players will be allowed on court at any time. A team may have up to five substitutes.
Mixed teams must not have more than 3 males on the court.
Injuries
The need to minimise disruption for subsequent games means that, except in finals, there is no extra time for time out in this competition. An injured player must leave the court as soon as reasonably possible so that play may continue. Once an injured player leaves the court his or her position may be filled with a substituted player.
If a player is bleeding he or she must vacate the court immediately and cannot return until the bleeding has stopped.
Uniforms
All team members except the goal-keeper must wear the same colour tops. Tops must be numbered. Except for the goal keeper, all team members must wear the same colour shorts. Shorts must be sports or soccer shorts and have no outside pockets. For each incorrect uniform item including no-numbers on tops, teams will lose 1 goal to a maximum of 3 goals for a game. Teams will be given 3 weeks to organise their uniforms before the penalties apply.
Goal keepers who become general field players by substitution are to change to the team’s uniform.
Jewellery is not part of the uniform and is not to be worn during a game. In addition to the penalties attached to the wearing of incorrectly coloured or inappropriate items teams which commence play with a member wearing jewellery will not be permitted to continue play until the team member sheds the item. The penalties that apply to a late start will apply from the moment that the jewellery item is detected until the moment that the game recommences.
The wearing of peaked hats or caps in the course of play shall be treated as the wearing of jewellery.
Except for the goalkeeper, track suit pants are not allowed except by prior written arrangement with APISC management.
Uniform penalties will apply to ‘fill ins’ who are not in the team’s colours. This does not apply to players provided by the Centre as a substitute.
All players must wear non-marking rubber soled shoes. Shoes with raised eyelets are not allowed.
Singlets and tank tops are not permitted.
Unacceptable Language
Swearing, bad language, racist comments are unacceptable at APISC and are treated as red card offences.
A player who uses unacceptable language will not be warned, but will concede a penalty to the opposition and will be asked to leave the court immediately and will not be allowed back on to the court for the rest of the game.
The position of offending player’s sent off court cannot be filled unless the offending player was a goal keeper. One on field player only may change to goal keeper in this instance, but the remaining players may not change position.
The referee will ask spectators (including players not on the pitch) who use unacceptable language to leave the premises. Failure to do so will result in the game being abandoned and the offending team deemed to have lost on forfeit.
Red Card
Two yellow cards in one match denote a red card.
If a player receives a red card, he or she must vacate the court immediately and is suspended from playing in the competition for one week. He or she cannot be replaced for the remainder of the game in which the red card offence occurs.
Should a red card player continue to abuse a referee after being sent off the player will be suspended for two weeks.
If a captain allows or replaces a suspended player on the court, the team will lose 8 premiership points and the captain will be suspended for 2 games.
Any player who receives 3 red cards will be suspended from the competition for the rest of the season. Any player who receives a red card will be automatically suspended from winning any Best & Fairest Award.
GAME RULES
Referee
There shall be one referee per match. The match referee is responsible for all events on and surrounding a court between the end of one game and the start of another.
Referees are independent service providers employed by the teams. However, the Centre expects that referees will not act in a manner contrary to the Centre’s interests. When, in the opinion of Centre management acting reasonably, a referee is acting contrary to the Centre’s interest, management may intervene and do all that is necessary to preserve the Centre’s interest.
If a player abuses or shows dissent towards a referee the offending player will be asked to leave the court and will not be allowed back on the court for the rest of the game. An offending player’s position cannot be filled unless the offending player was goal keeper. One player only may change to goal keeper in this instance, but the remaining players may not change position.
If a player persists in abusive behaviour after being asked to leave the court the player will be asked to leave the premises.
Any queries that players may have about rules and their interpretations are only to be asked of the referee at half or full time. In the course of play a referee’s decision is final.
If a player becomes too aggressive on court, at the referee’s discretion and in lieu of a red or yellow card, he or she may be sent from the court for a cooling off period of 5 minutes. The team will be penalised by playing 4 players only until the cooling off period is finished. The player may retake the court immediately after this cooling off period.
Fighting
Should a fight occur between teams during a game, the game will automatically be stopped. No points will be awarded. There will be no appeal and both teams may be asked to leave the competition.
Kick Off
At the kick off the ball must go forward.
A goal can not be scored directly from kick off.
Area of Play
Players may score goals from anywhere on the court including the goalkeepers D. There are no restricted areas.
Local Playing Conditions
If the ball hits the roof or a light, the game will be restarted by a kick in from the sideline by the non-offending team or by an indirect free kick if the impact occurred as a result of an indiscriminate kick.
If in the opinion of the referee a ball is kicked indiscriminately an indirect free kick shall be awarded to the non-offending team.
Substitution
An on court player may substitute at any time, provided the substitution occurs at the centre line of the court. The on-coming player may not enter the playing court until the on-court player is over the side-line. Goalie substitution can only occur if the goalie has the ball and the referee is notified.
Slide Tackles
Sliding in order to reach the ball to stop it or to tackle a player increases the risk of player injury, sliding is a red card offence. A penalty will be awarded to the opposition.
A goalkeeper may slide in the defence of the goal if he or she begins the slide inside the goalkeeper’s D. If a goalkeeper’s slide continues outside the D the goalkeeper must not make contact with an opponent.
A goalkeeper’s slide must not be reckless, careless or made in a manner that uses excessive force.
Five Metre Rule
This rule applies for all kick ins and free kicks. A defending player must be 5 metres back from where the kick is taken. Any infringing player will receive one warning, then a yellow card. If a quick free kick is taken no defending player who is within 3 metres from the spot can obstruct the kick. This is a yellow card offence and a 3 metre advance free kick.
Players must stand back five metres from the ball when it is brought back into play from:
- a Kick in, or a Kick off
- a corner kick
- by the goalie
- a free kick
Failure to do so will result in a free kick.
Out of Court
When the ball goes out of court a player must kick the ball back into play by placing the ball on the outside line. The player taking the kick in must be outside the court. Failure to do so will result in the decision being reversed
No goal can be scored with a direct kick from the outside line.
A player has 4 seconds to kick the ball back into the court. Failure to do so will result in a free kick to the opposition.
Penalty Shot on Siren
A penalty shot, awarded on the siren (marking the end of the half or the game) must be played.
In a mixed game where the goalie is female only a female may take a penalty shot.
Goalkeeper
In order for the goalkeeper to handle the ball, the ball and the goalkeeper must be inside the goalkeepers D. The goalkeeper may roll or throw the ball out of the goalkeepers D , or place the ball on the ground before kicking it. The goalkeeper may throw or kick the ball in over half way. If the goalkeeper kicks the ball from his or her hands or drop-kicks the ball, a free kick outside the “D” will be paid against them.
The goalkeeper has 4 seconds to get rid of the ball from the goalkeeper’s area. Failure to do so will result in a free kick outside the “D”. The goalkeeper, once outside the “D”, will be treated as an on field player.
If the goal keeper steps outside the “D” while handling the ball, the opposition will be awarded a penalty kick.
Once the goalkeeper has thrown or kicked the ball back into play they may only touch the ball with their hands if there is a shot on goal by the opposition or the ball has gone over half way.
Highball
Highball is not allowed at the Pit buildings. Highball is allowed at other venues under APISC control.
Highball is defined as a ball being kicked one foot higher than the tallest player on court. A free kick shall be awarded against the team that kicked the highball, from where the kick or header occurred.
Players may not lift their legs above knee high when playing a ball.
Fouls
Red cards will be given and a penalty awarded to the non offending team for:
- Second yellow card offence
- Serious foul play
- Swearing, foul or racist language
- Slide tackling of any nature
- Kicking or charging the goalie
- Professional foul
- Deliberate handball
- Striking
Yellow cards will be rewarded for:
- Shirt pulling
- Tackling from behind
- Pushing
- Pushing from behind.
Yellow cards shall be given if the umpire deems that a player commits any of the above offences and a warning is appropriate. A free kick shall be awarded to the non offending team
Five Direct Free Fouls
Teams may only accumulate five free fouls per half. After and including a sixth foul occurs within a half, a direct free kick shall be awarded outside the D with no wall allowed. If the offence occurs within the Goalie’s D the free kick will be given two metres outside the D.
The player taking the free kick must have a shot at goal. No other players are permitted to touch the ball other than the goalie and the person taking the free kick during this passage of play. Other players may touch the ball once the goalie has returned the ball to the field of play or the ball has rebounded off the goal posts.
Time Wasting
Time wasting will be determined by the referee and will result in a yellow card and a free kick.
Kicking the ball away from the designated play position after the whistle has gone will result in a yellow card and a free kick to the opposition.
Advantage
An advantage may be played at the referee’s discretion even though a prior foul may have occurred.
Equipment
Major interference with the goal in any way shall result in an automatic goal against the offending players team. Additionally, a player hanging on the goal shall be sent off for the duration of the game.
If equipment is damaged through vandalism the player responsible shall bear the cost of repair or replacement.
Miscellaneous
APISC is not affiliated with FIFA or any other group.
No pets are allowed in the building. No bicycles or roller blades are allowed on the courts.
Strictly no smoking in the area of the courts.
Teams are to provide a minimum of three team contacts with home, work and mobile telephone numbers and e-mail address.
Only size 4 indoor soccer balls, as used by APISC can be used on court.
It is the responsibility of team captains to make sure that all players know the time of their games and that team members arrive on time.
During the Australian Grand Prix at Albert Park APISC will make every effort to locate other suitable premises for the conduct of the competition. If APISC cannot find any suitable indoor venues for a competition, games will be fixtured outdoors and the competition conducted outdoors.
Players play at their own risk. APISC accepts no liability for any injury that a player might receive in the course of a game.
Persons who have been asked to leave the Centre and who do not do so immediately will be treated as trespassers.
A game will not be stopped for a player to do up his or her shoelaces.
Ignorance of the rules is no excuse.
Management has the final discretion on any matter connected with the conduct of the Centre.
Monday, November 26, 2007
First Game of the New Era...
6PM SUNDAY DECEMBER 2ND.
Address:
Princess Hill Secondary College
Cnr Paterson St & Garton St,
Carlton North
Getting There:
Melways 29 H11
More details to follow.
Address:
Princess Hill Secondary College
Cnr Paterson St & Garton St,
Carlton North
Getting There:
Melways 29 H11
More details to follow.
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Former GSE Captain Ads tells Les Murray: "You're a Bitter Cunt"
Let me jump on the bandwagon and agree with some of the lot that has been said about the Dick Advocaat betrayal and where to from here.
:: Advocaat is a scoundrel. (Come on Les now you sound like a jilted lover, I’m sure you can find someone else’s asshole to lick)
:: Australia needs now to recruit someone who is internationally experienced and respected but doesn’t see the Australian job as his cash yielding retirement gig (not at all like Guus. I hear that he has a real interest in Russian soccer not dirty dirty Abromovich roubles).
:: The new national coach must spend the bulk of his time in Australia and embrace the national ‘mission’, supervising and writing the blueprint for all our national teams, including the women (what the fuck for? Female soccer is liking watch a stripper with one leg you can’t helping watching for a bit but in the end you get bored and feel sick).
:: The Hiddink-sparked Dutch technical method and ideology, adopted by the senior Australian national teams over the past two years, must remain in place in the interests of continuity.
On the first point there is little argument and not much more needs to be said. Advocaat, a Dick by name and character, (lets not start talking about dicks Les) reneged on a word of honour (boo hoo its not the fucking 15th century either sue him for breach of contract or fuck off). Indeed Zenit must be run by buffoons if they are prepared to put under contract a man with such form, who so easily and willingly backed out on previous deals, at least twice. (Yeah they must be fucking idiots. Its not as if he broke the Moscow domination of the Russian domestic lead and took the title to the old Tsarist Capital….ooooh wait he did do that.)
I hope he walks out on them (meeeow, bitch), as he has done on the UAE and Australia, and he probably will at the first sign of crap weather, and there is plenty of that in St Petersburg (fuck you Les, now you’re just bagging a city’s weather. On that premise I don’t think anyone would manage any team in England).
On the second and third points there are surely no arguments either: Australia does need a pedigree coach but it also needs someone who believes in the grander national purpose and who is willing and able to leave a lasting legacy. No quick-buck opportunists need apply.
But the most critical, at least in the immediate sense, is the last point.
Guus Hiddink, remarkably given his short reign, turned the technical culture of our national team on its head. So deep is his imprint that our two most senior national teams, the Socceroos and the Olyroos, 17 months after his departure, insist on playing his way, the ‘Dutch’ way (what the fuck does that mean? Do the play in a red light district smoking pot and giving up and turning coat everytime they play against the Germans).
We saw this in the way the Olyroos overcame Iraq in Gosford and how the Socceroos, in a superbly impressive way, outplayed Nigeria in London.
We have gone Dutch. In both games there was crisp passing, an emphasis on ball possession, the use of wingers (the wingers were in a 4-4-2 formation dipshit. Total Football all the way with that one), sweet movement off the ball and a collective understanding. They were joyous sights and rarely, in both games, did Australia look like losing.
This is a serious legacy of Hiddink and, though he is now gone, it should not be allowed to slip. There is the evolution of a definable technical direction underway, already governing the top end of our football and it should be made to last.
And it is unmistakeably Dutch.
Australia’s technical director is Dutch (no you don’t say. With your wonderful powers of detection why are you wasting time writing articles for the world game when there are thousands of unsolved murders for you to solve. Run Les run). Rob Baan had a huge hand in laying the foundations of the recent Olyroos campaign, bringing a flowing unity to a bunch of youngsters in whom, frankly, not too many of us had much faith.
Graham Arnold, a Hiddink disciple who spent years in Holland as a player, is now continuing Baan’s work.
And it appears that Baan will also have a big hand in authoring the substance and philosophy of our grassroots development, as foreshadowed in the FFA’s recently released national development plan.
The Dutch train is steaming and has reached top speed. It would be crazy to now derail it. And a case of derailing it would be if the new man was of a different technical culture, like a German, or an Italian, a Brazilian or even a Frenchman (proof that Les Murray is a racist).
It would be a case of starting again from scratch and going back two years.(racist)
So who are the Dutchmen the FFA could or should target in the interests of continuing this Dutch semester?
There is no shortage of candidates with reasonable profiles and good credentials. And most of them are available.
The rest of this article is bullshit I have chosen to right no more about it except: Johan Cruyff are you fucking joking? Frank Rijkaard, you must be fucking joking. I can see it now:
“I would like to resign from Barcelona because I would prefer to work with Luke Wilkshire instead of Leo Messi.”
JOHAN CRUYFF
Now steady on. I am not saying the great man would come out of retirement for this gig. But his name cannot be avoided. He is the embodiment of the ‘beautiful game’, as both player and coach, and having steered Barcelona to a European Cup win and four straight Primera championships makes his choice just about unchallengeable.
Downside: Never coached a national team. Has no knowledge of Asia.
FOPPE DE HAAN
Steered Holland to two successive European Under 21 championship wins in 2006 and 2007. Took Holland into the finals of the Beijing Olympics next year. Coached SC Heerenveen between 1985 and 2004, the longest spell by any coach with a Dutch club. Took them into the Champions League in 1999. Graham Arnold is a huge fan.
Downside: Virtually unknown in Australia. Currently under contract as Holland’s Olympic coach. No experience in Asia.
WIM JANSEN
Successful former coach of Feyenoord, Glasgow Celtic, Sanfrecce Hiroshima and Urawa Reds. Coached Celtic to their first championship in ten years. Has a decent handle on Asian football through his time in Japan.
Downside: Not a ‘big name’ in Australia.
MARTIN JOL
Nicknamed Tony Soprano because of his appearance, the recently sacked Tottenham boss’ main credits are having once saved RKC Waalwijk from relegation and taking amateur ADO Den Haag from the third division to the first.
Downside: Not an impressive enough track record.
JOHAN NEESKENS
The legendary ex-team mate of Cruyff is well acquainted with the Australian players and culture, having served as one of Hiddink’s assistants. Currently in a most beneficial environment, assistant to Frank Rijkaard with probably the most admired club team in the world. Could do worse.
Downside: No track record as a senior national coach, nor any experience in Asia.
HANS OOFT
His name hasn’t surfaced in the recent bout of speculation, yet could be one of the most qualified. Coached Japan for two years in the early ‘90s when Japan won the Asian Cup for the first time and missed out tragically, by one goal, on qualifying for the 1994 World Cup (which would have been Japan’s first). Ooft, 60, was also a successful coach in the J-League, with both Jubilo Iwata and Urawa Reds. Currently in retirement, living in Holland.
Downside: Has been inactive since 2003, low profile.
FRANK RIJKAARD
Now here’s a name, but would he come? Already a European Cup winner with Barca and a European Championship semi finalist, his playing methods are the role models to which all teams should aspire, including the Socceroos.
Downside: Under contract to FC Barcelona. No experience in Asia.
PIM VERBEEK
If experience in Asia is a core essential, he could be our man. He spent many years in Korea, as assistant to both Hiddink and Advocaat and then as national coach with this year’s Asian Cup bronze medallists. He has already said he is keen and ready to come and, at 51, is among the younger of the candidates.
Downside: Considered ‘middle-tier’ in profile, probably not high enough for Frank Lowy
:: Advocaat is a scoundrel. (Come on Les now you sound like a jilted lover, I’m sure you can find someone else’s asshole to lick)
:: Australia needs now to recruit someone who is internationally experienced and respected but doesn’t see the Australian job as his cash yielding retirement gig (not at all like Guus. I hear that he has a real interest in Russian soccer not dirty dirty Abromovich roubles).
:: The new national coach must spend the bulk of his time in Australia and embrace the national ‘mission’, supervising and writing the blueprint for all our national teams, including the women (what the fuck for? Female soccer is liking watch a stripper with one leg you can’t helping watching for a bit but in the end you get bored and feel sick).
:: The Hiddink-sparked Dutch technical method and ideology, adopted by the senior Australian national teams over the past two years, must remain in place in the interests of continuity.
On the first point there is little argument and not much more needs to be said. Advocaat, a Dick by name and character, (lets not start talking about dicks Les) reneged on a word of honour (boo hoo its not the fucking 15th century either sue him for breach of contract or fuck off). Indeed Zenit must be run by buffoons if they are prepared to put under contract a man with such form, who so easily and willingly backed out on previous deals, at least twice. (Yeah they must be fucking idiots. Its not as if he broke the Moscow domination of the Russian domestic lead and took the title to the old Tsarist Capital….ooooh wait he did do that.)
I hope he walks out on them (meeeow, bitch), as he has done on the UAE and Australia, and he probably will at the first sign of crap weather, and there is plenty of that in St Petersburg (fuck you Les, now you’re just bagging a city’s weather. On that premise I don’t think anyone would manage any team in England).
On the second and third points there are surely no arguments either: Australia does need a pedigree coach but it also needs someone who believes in the grander national purpose and who is willing and able to leave a lasting legacy. No quick-buck opportunists need apply.
But the most critical, at least in the immediate sense, is the last point.
Guus Hiddink, remarkably given his short reign, turned the technical culture of our national team on its head. So deep is his imprint that our two most senior national teams, the Socceroos and the Olyroos, 17 months after his departure, insist on playing his way, the ‘Dutch’ way (what the fuck does that mean? Do the play in a red light district smoking pot and giving up and turning coat everytime they play against the Germans).
We saw this in the way the Olyroos overcame Iraq in Gosford and how the Socceroos, in a superbly impressive way, outplayed Nigeria in London.
We have gone Dutch. In both games there was crisp passing, an emphasis on ball possession, the use of wingers (the wingers were in a 4-4-2 formation dipshit. Total Football all the way with that one), sweet movement off the ball and a collective understanding. They were joyous sights and rarely, in both games, did Australia look like losing.
This is a serious legacy of Hiddink and, though he is now gone, it should not be allowed to slip. There is the evolution of a definable technical direction underway, already governing the top end of our football and it should be made to last.
And it is unmistakeably Dutch.
Australia’s technical director is Dutch (no you don’t say. With your wonderful powers of detection why are you wasting time writing articles for the world game when there are thousands of unsolved murders for you to solve. Run Les run). Rob Baan had a huge hand in laying the foundations of the recent Olyroos campaign, bringing a flowing unity to a bunch of youngsters in whom, frankly, not too many of us had much faith.
Graham Arnold, a Hiddink disciple who spent years in Holland as a player, is now continuing Baan’s work.
And it appears that Baan will also have a big hand in authoring the substance and philosophy of our grassroots development, as foreshadowed in the FFA’s recently released national development plan.
The Dutch train is steaming and has reached top speed. It would be crazy to now derail it. And a case of derailing it would be if the new man was of a different technical culture, like a German, or an Italian, a Brazilian or even a Frenchman (proof that Les Murray is a racist).
It would be a case of starting again from scratch and going back two years.(racist)
So who are the Dutchmen the FFA could or should target in the interests of continuing this Dutch semester?
There is no shortage of candidates with reasonable profiles and good credentials. And most of them are available.
The rest of this article is bullshit I have chosen to right no more about it except: Johan Cruyff are you fucking joking? Frank Rijkaard, you must be fucking joking. I can see it now:
“I would like to resign from Barcelona because I would prefer to work with Luke Wilkshire instead of Leo Messi.”
JOHAN CRUYFF
Now steady on. I am not saying the great man would come out of retirement for this gig. But his name cannot be avoided. He is the embodiment of the ‘beautiful game’, as both player and coach, and having steered Barcelona to a European Cup win and four straight Primera championships makes his choice just about unchallengeable.
Downside: Never coached a national team. Has no knowledge of Asia.
FOPPE DE HAAN
Steered Holland to two successive European Under 21 championship wins in 2006 and 2007. Took Holland into the finals of the Beijing Olympics next year. Coached SC Heerenveen between 1985 and 2004, the longest spell by any coach with a Dutch club. Took them into the Champions League in 1999. Graham Arnold is a huge fan.
Downside: Virtually unknown in Australia. Currently under contract as Holland’s Olympic coach. No experience in Asia.
WIM JANSEN
Successful former coach of Feyenoord, Glasgow Celtic, Sanfrecce Hiroshima and Urawa Reds. Coached Celtic to their first championship in ten years. Has a decent handle on Asian football through his time in Japan.
Downside: Not a ‘big name’ in Australia.
MARTIN JOL
Nicknamed Tony Soprano because of his appearance, the recently sacked Tottenham boss’ main credits are having once saved RKC Waalwijk from relegation and taking amateur ADO Den Haag from the third division to the first.
Downside: Not an impressive enough track record.
JOHAN NEESKENS
The legendary ex-team mate of Cruyff is well acquainted with the Australian players and culture, having served as one of Hiddink’s assistants. Currently in a most beneficial environment, assistant to Frank Rijkaard with probably the most admired club team in the world. Could do worse.
Downside: No track record as a senior national coach, nor any experience in Asia.
HANS OOFT
His name hasn’t surfaced in the recent bout of speculation, yet could be one of the most qualified. Coached Japan for two years in the early ‘90s when Japan won the Asian Cup for the first time and missed out tragically, by one goal, on qualifying for the 1994 World Cup (which would have been Japan’s first). Ooft, 60, was also a successful coach in the J-League, with both Jubilo Iwata and Urawa Reds. Currently in retirement, living in Holland.
Downside: Has been inactive since 2003, low profile.
FRANK RIJKAARD
Now here’s a name, but would he come? Already a European Cup winner with Barca and a European Championship semi finalist, his playing methods are the role models to which all teams should aspire, including the Socceroos.
Downside: Under contract to FC Barcelona. No experience in Asia.
PIM VERBEEK
If experience in Asia is a core essential, he could be our man. He spent many years in Korea, as assistant to both Hiddink and Advocaat and then as national coach with this year’s Asian Cup bronze medallists. He has already said he is keen and ready to come and, at 51, is among the younger of the candidates.
Downside: Considered ‘middle-tier’ in profile, probably not high enough for Frank Lowy
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Former GSE Captain Ads tells England: "You're Shit and You Know You Are"
Wow, Just Like Lord Of The Rings
Imagine Lord of the Rings with all the heroes acting and performing like our England team.
It would be f*cking chaos.
Aragorn would be a complete pussy. He'd talk a fair game but would be a crap hero. He'd panic and fall off the bridge on the way out to meet the Orcs and splutter around in the ditch until it was too late. The elf and that dwarf thing would attack each other or cower in different parts of the castle/battlefield.
The villagers would NOT join in but turn on their leaders and make them feel even worse, bitching about their lack of heroism without giving them the one thing they need: support.
Boromir would sulk if the local rags dissed his performance, and get on his high horse if they praised him.
Gandalf the Grey, sorry White, sorry no Blue, or actually no Green, would have no clue what was going on. The plans would be a mess, no one would know who was doing what, where or why, and the trilogy would have been over before it was even a bilogy.
The point is, our culture seems to have forgotten what values are. We talk about heroism and courage but we don't really know what it means any more. Balls. Commitment. Doing things you don't want to do. Doing things you're afraid to do. Supporting a lost cause. Acting without fear. All very alien to us, except in movies and fantasy tales.
Instead we know the values of money, fame, and good looks. The Sun is our cultural beacon. Which is why a country with nothing to play for can win away from home, and our flailing 'heroes' can't even muster up a concerted effort.
Perhaps our talent pool and our league will continue to give us places in most international competitions, but I'd rather be a Scotland fan any day. At least I'd have some values to shout for.
I'd like to say we could learn from this, but I doubt it. Shame. We coulda been contenders.
Imagine Lord of the Rings with all the heroes acting and performing like our England team.
It would be f*cking chaos.
Aragorn would be a complete pussy. He'd talk a fair game but would be a crap hero. He'd panic and fall off the bridge on the way out to meet the Orcs and splutter around in the ditch until it was too late. The elf and that dwarf thing would attack each other or cower in different parts of the castle/battlefield.
The villagers would NOT join in but turn on their leaders and make them feel even worse, bitching about their lack of heroism without giving them the one thing they need: support.
Boromir would sulk if the local rags dissed his performance, and get on his high horse if they praised him.
Gandalf the Grey, sorry White, sorry no Blue, or actually no Green, would have no clue what was going on. The plans would be a mess, no one would know who was doing what, where or why, and the trilogy would have been over before it was even a bilogy.
The point is, our culture seems to have forgotten what values are. We talk about heroism and courage but we don't really know what it means any more. Balls. Commitment. Doing things you don't want to do. Doing things you're afraid to do. Supporting a lost cause. Acting without fear. All very alien to us, except in movies and fantasy tales.
Instead we know the values of money, fame, and good looks. The Sun is our cultural beacon. Which is why a country with nothing to play for can win away from home, and our flailing 'heroes' can't even muster up a concerted effort.
Perhaps our talent pool and our league will continue to give us places in most international competitions, but I'd rather be a Scotland fan any day. At least I'd have some values to shout for.
I'd like to say we could learn from this, but I doubt it. Shame. We coulda been contenders.
Monday, November 19, 2007
New Direction for the GSE
As of December, GSE will be moving to the new establishment of Albert Park Indoor Sports Centre (APISC). Captain Desmond made the decision in consultation with other players, and it was decided the GSE needed a change of scenery if it were to succeed. Despite what seems like an embarrassing retreat from Action Indoor Sports Centres, GSE have vowed to return one day to continue their quest for an elusive Grand Final victory and trophy.
The APISC also have slightly varying rules, with bigger courts, a requirement of 5 players (including keeper) to take the field, and no restrictions on keeper movement/shooting inside "keeper's circle". APISC also has outs, allowing for brief respites for certain asthmatic players.
The move will also signal a wave of agressive recruitment for the team, something that has worried established/bitter/older players (Ads) worried about their position of dominance in the side. One target includes a former second XI captain of country schoolboy side, St Paul's.
Season to commence the weekend after the demise of John Howard - 2nd December.
The APISC also have slightly varying rules, with bigger courts, a requirement of 5 players (including keeper) to take the field, and no restrictions on keeper movement/shooting inside "keeper's circle". APISC also has outs, allowing for brief respites for certain asthmatic players.
The move will also signal a wave of agressive recruitment for the team, something that has worried established/bitter/older players (Ads) worried about their position of dominance in the side. One target includes a former second XI captain of country schoolboy side, St Paul's.
Season to commence the weekend after the demise of John Howard - 2nd December.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Merrick to make long awaited changes
Melbourne Victory's newly proposed squad for the rivalry clash against Sydney FC
-------------------Theoklitos
--------------Pace---------Chook
---Muscat----------------------------Kemp
---------------------Ads
---Desmond-------------------------Caceras
------------------Hernandez
------------Allsopp------Thompson
-------------------Theoklitos
--------------Pace---------Chook
---Muscat----------------------------Kemp
---------------------Ads
---Desmond-------------------------Caceras
------------------Hernandez
------------Allsopp------Thompson
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Judgement Day for Jords and GSE
The Elite have taken a big knock late into their season with ex-captain Jords set for an extended sideline stint.
Jords goes in for surgery on his knee today after injuring it in the gay sport of hockey last month.
The foundation Elite keeper revealed he has cartilage problems in his knee, and he has been battling through the pain ever since watching GSE fall from grace into 5th position from the sidelines.
"To be watching is not what I want, it's just one of those things in life that happens," Jords said.
"I've got major problems within the knee like the cartilage, that is why I’m undertaking T-three o-plasty to reduce the risk of it ever happening again and increasing the chance of early recovery."
T-three-o-plasty is the third updated version of the Terminator-o-plasty, where the patient skin is peeled off and replaced with a hard metallic shell, preferably titanium. The bones are snapped out and replaced with various fire-arms and anti-missile defenses. Finally a chip is placed in his vocal cords to give the patient a German/Austrian like accent.
Green Street Elite will miss Jord's experience and skill at the keeper position, he is expected to be ruled out for at least nine months.
"The good doctor says after the transformation surgery it should be 4-6 weeks and with my new terminator healing powers hopefully I can get back a little bit earlier, and hopefully this AK-47 being installed to the knee should come in handy.
"We'll just have to wait and see."
The injury means new signing younger brother Nick will split the keeper role with Joe’s import Cia (Maaaaaaate!).
And after a solid GSE debut in the win to No Idea on Sunday night, Jords is already jealous with his younger substitute.
"He's done a fantastic job (Nick). He got his first introduction to the Indoor scenery and did well," he said.
Now trailing by 5 points to Polonia, there are positive signs for GSE to make the finals and are expected to play Asian wannabe soccer players Rio Platence in the campaign.
(The Terminatoroplasty is purely cosmetic and should not be used in combat purposes)
Monday, October 22, 2007
It it time to enact section 65-12(a)(i) of the GST Constitution
s.65-12(a)(i) states that if any GSE captain fails to fulfil any of the following requirements an impeachment of the captain can be issued by a 66.67% vote of the membership.
The requirements are:
1. To field a team with at minimum 3 players;
2. To bitch at Ads when he just worked 60 hours straight on a tax law assignment and slept at work on Saturday night;
3. To be The Hated One; or
4. To play under the influence of performance enhancing drugs
Now we all know how Chook finished his first reign as captain of GSE (let's just say there wasn't a fourth point on the list above until Chook took some LSD shit that made him think he was Papa Smurf and that he was so small that he could run between the legs of other players).
If Desmond is sacked I also propose that a joint tenure solidarity ticket be formed between Chook and Ads. With Chook and Ads together we can bring peace and harmony throughout the galaxy.
So cast your votes motherfuckers.
The requirements are:
1. To field a team with at minimum 3 players;
2. To bitch at Ads when he just worked 60 hours straight on a tax law assignment and slept at work on Saturday night;
3. To be The Hated One; or
4. To play under the influence of performance enhancing drugs
Now we all know how Chook finished his first reign as captain of GSE (let's just say there wasn't a fourth point on the list above until Chook took some LSD shit that made him think he was Papa Smurf and that he was so small that he could run between the legs of other players).
If Desmond is sacked I also propose that a joint tenure solidarity ticket be formed between Chook and Ads. With Chook and Ads together we can bring peace and harmony throughout the galaxy.
So cast your votes motherfuckers.
Sunday, October 21, 2007
GSE in Tatters: Is this our last season?
Seeing how we were the first match of the night, we could not find a replacement before the match so yesterday's starting line-up for GSE's match against Rio Platence was as follows;
---------ActionIndoor Referee (gk) (I'm not joking)
------------------Chook
------Tuema-------------Opposition Player
Now we sit 10 points behind Polonia with 6 points deducted off our score because of the Forfeit. Even if Joe and Dez arrived before the 8 minute mark we still would have lost being 8 goals down.
Our remaining matches are as follows
Round 15 will be the decider if and only if we actually have more than two players on the field at the start of kick-off for the next two rounds.
Other News:
*Tuema is now the most reliable player having arrived the earliest to the match and was looking for replacements
*Action Indoor Ref is the worst keeper to have put on a GSE jersey (I'm even better)
*The Joe/Dez/Tuema combination in attack worked well
*Adam will be the only one left now who doesn't have Facebook
*I stayed up again to watch West Ham play only to fall asleep 10 minutes into the game
*'Scarface: The world is yours' has to be the next best game, maybe even better than the GTA series.
* PS. Question to Dez: Was it Trish that pulled the plug on 60 Minute's Election Debate after seeing the worm favouring Kevin Rudd the whole Debate
---------ActionIndoor Referee (gk) (I'm not joking)
------------------Chook
------Tuema-------------Opposition Player
Now we sit 10 points behind Polonia with 6 points deducted off our score because of the Forfeit. Even if Joe and Dez arrived before the 8 minute mark we still would have lost being 8 goals down.
Our remaining matches are as follows
13 | Columbian Flu | Sunday | 28 Oct 07 | 7:10 PM | GABBA |
14 | No Idea | Sunday | 4 Nov 07 | 7:10 PM | GABBA |
15 | Polonia | Sunday | 11 Nov 07 | 9:30 PM | GABBA |
Other News:
*Tuema is now the most reliable player having arrived the earliest to the match and was looking for replacements
*Action Indoor Ref is the worst keeper to have put on a GSE jersey (I'm even better)
*The Joe/Dez/Tuema combination in attack worked well
*Adam will be the only one left now who doesn't have Facebook
*I stayed up again to watch West Ham play only to fall asleep 10 minutes into the game
*'Scarface: The world is yours' has to be the next best game, maybe even better than the GTA series.
* PS. Question to Dez: Was it Trish that pulled the plug on 60 Minute's Election Debate after seeing the worm favouring Kevin Rudd the whole Debate
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Ads passes his first CA subject
I rock so much.
I still don't even know how PALER works.
But at least I've scheduled my cock.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Aloisi: U R A Dick
Socceroo John Aloisi is set to join his brother Ross Aloisi at the Wellington Phoenix according to reports after the league's newest franchise beat Adelaide United to his signature.
Aloisi had been discussed by United coach Aurelio Vidmar as a short term replacement for the injured Olyroo Bruce Djite who suffered an ankle injury against Perth Glory in Round 7.
Adelaide United CEO Michael Petrille has however confirmed that the World Cup Socceroo and 2005 penalty shooutout hero against Uruguay would not be joining the Reds."It's highly unlikely, we're talking about a short-term contract and bringing a guy out from overseas. We're more looking at a defender (for Mike Valkanis)," Petrillo told The Adelaide Advertiser.
The move would see Aloisi make history as it will represent the first time he and his brother Ross have played together in the same team, with the Phoenix set to offer the former Alaves and Osasuna man a long term contract.Aloisi is currently out of contract after leaving Alaves and had been linked with Sydney FC and Queensland Roar prior to the start of season three of the A-League.
Aloisi had been discussed by United coach Aurelio Vidmar as a short term replacement for the injured Olyroo Bruce Djite who suffered an ankle injury against Perth Glory in Round 7.
Adelaide United CEO Michael Petrille has however confirmed that the World Cup Socceroo and 2005 penalty shooutout hero against Uruguay would not be joining the Reds."It's highly unlikely, we're talking about a short-term contract and bringing a guy out from overseas. We're more looking at a defender (for Mike Valkanis)," Petrillo told The Adelaide Advertiser.
The move would see Aloisi make history as it will represent the first time he and his brother Ross have played together in the same team, with the Phoenix set to offer the former Alaves and Osasuna man a long term contract.Aloisi is currently out of contract after leaving Alaves and had been linked with Sydney FC and Queensland Roar prior to the start of season three of the A-League.
Archie please don't go, Archie please don't go down to New Orleans, You know I love you so Archie please don't go
Suspended Melbourne Victory star Archie Thompson has hit back at the club suggesting he has been made a scapegoat following his club's loss to Adelaide United last Friday.
Victory suspended Thompson and teammate Ljubo Milicevic for a breach of curfew after the pair slept in missing breakfast before flying home to Melbourne.
Thompson has hit back at the ban, which he has described as 'petty' and 'laughable'.
"I'm very disappointed at how things have ended - just for missing breakfast," Thompson told Melbourne's Herald Sun newspaper.
"We were disappointed we lost the game, but we don't like to dwell on it. It looked like they were trying to look for scapegoats for the loss. The club's gone over the top. I'm missing breakfast and I get suspended. C'mon, that's pretty petty."
"Everyone I've talked to believes it is laughable. Sometimes you've got to put your hand up for the loss, but why all this?"
"Hopefully this gets resolved because I feel me and Ljubo have got so much to offer the team," he added.
The ban further fuels speculation that Thompson may seek a exit back to Europe with the Socceroo last plying his trade overseas with PSV Eindhoven in an albeit unsuccessful spell.
"I would like to go back overseas if it was to the right club," he told Melbourne's The Age newspaper on Monday.The suspended pair's immediate future is set to be decided by the club's leadership group including skipper Kevin Muscat, a group in which Thompson would normally be a part of.
"I am still scratching my head. I don't know what's going on, I don't know what the situation is. I am so upset about what's going on," added Thompson in The Age."You work your arse off to do things for the club and then this happens. We just missed breakfast. It's been so badly handled.""It's very disappointing, and then I find out from the media that the decision on when the suspension will be lifted will be made by the leadership group - when I am part of the leadership group."
Victory suspended Thompson and teammate Ljubo Milicevic for a breach of curfew after the pair slept in missing breakfast before flying home to Melbourne.
Thompson has hit back at the ban, which he has described as 'petty' and 'laughable'.
"I'm very disappointed at how things have ended - just for missing breakfast," Thompson told Melbourne's Herald Sun newspaper.
"We were disappointed we lost the game, but we don't like to dwell on it. It looked like they were trying to look for scapegoats for the loss. The club's gone over the top. I'm missing breakfast and I get suspended. C'mon, that's pretty petty."
"Everyone I've talked to believes it is laughable. Sometimes you've got to put your hand up for the loss, but why all this?"
"Hopefully this gets resolved because I feel me and Ljubo have got so much to offer the team," he added.
The ban further fuels speculation that Thompson may seek a exit back to Europe with the Socceroo last plying his trade overseas with PSV Eindhoven in an albeit unsuccessful spell.
"I would like to go back overseas if it was to the right club," he told Melbourne's The Age newspaper on Monday.The suspended pair's immediate future is set to be decided by the club's leadership group including skipper Kevin Muscat, a group in which Thompson would normally be a part of.
"I am still scratching my head. I don't know what's going on, I don't know what the situation is. I am so upset about what's going on," added Thompson in The Age."You work your arse off to do things for the club and then this happens. We just missed breakfast. It's been so badly handled.""It's very disappointing, and then I find out from the media that the decision on when the suspension will be lifted will be made by the leadership group - when I am part of the leadership group."
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Archie's Anger Over FourFourTwo List
VICTORY and Socceroos striker Archie Thompson has blasted FourFourTwo magazine's list of the Top 25 Australian footballers of all time for leaving out Mark Viduka.
We published our controversial list of the greatest players in the nation's history in our current issue on sale now.But Thompson has been infuriated by the selection panel's decision to leave out Newcastle United hitman Viduka.
He told Melbourne's Herald-Sun newspaper: "I'd have him in the top 10, top five for me.
"He's probably been one of the best players for a long time. To hear that, it's an absolute disgrace. The guy's an absolute legend. He's probably my No. 1."
Viduka was left out after a split between the magazine's judges over his record for his country.
With just 11 goals from 43 appearances, he is far from our most successful goalscorer.
But he played a key role as a target man for Australia in the World Cup and at the Asian Cup.
"He's been at top clubs in the UK and performed at that level and has always been there for Australian teams," Thompson added.
"For me, he's someone I've always looked up to as a player, and to not have him in there is a disgrace, really."
Former Socceroo Ange Postecoglou also believes Viduka should have been included.
“It was a surprise to not see him in there,” Postecoglou told au.fourfourtwo.com.
“Mark would be in my top five, never mind top 25.”
However Postecoglou was happy to see some of his contemporaries on the list.
“I think Oscar Crino was ahead of his generation. It was a different era back then, a much more physical game. Oscar really stood out," said the former national youth coach who is now a Fox Sports commentator.
“And Robbie Slater proved he could do it in a couple of different leagues.
“I would also have had Paul Okon in there. He had an injury-riddled career but when he was at the top of his game, he'd be in my top 25.”
FourFourTwo editor-in-chief Paul Hansford didn't vote for Viduka, but he is prepared to change his view if the public response is overwhelming in Viduka's favour.
Hansford did not believe Viduka's record with the Socceroos was good enough, and also said he could have done more in club football.
"Mark really polarised people," Hansford said.
"Football is a game of opinions and I'll be really interested to see how people fight Mark's corner."
See the full list in the latest issue - and if you disagree with the choices, leave your comments below and give us your best argument for including Viduka...and who you would leave out to fit him in and why.
Top 25 (Alphabetical order)
John Aloisi, Graham Arnold, Ray Baartz, Mark Bosnich, Tim Cahill, Oscar Crino, Alan Davidson, Frank Farina, Craig Johnston, Harry Kewell, John Kosmina, Jimmy Mackay, Joe Marston, Damian Mori, Jimmy Rooney, Mark Schwarzer, Robbie Slater, Alex Tobin, Tony Vidmar, Paul Wade, Johnny Warren, Harry Williams, Peter Wilson, Charlie Yankos, Ned Zelic.
Sven's $10m Swoop For Bresh
MAN City boss Sven Goran Eriksson is set to make a $30million swoop for Socceroo Mark Bresciano and Liverpool striker Peter Crouch in January.
Bresciano almost joined City in the close season but the deal fell through at the last moment after the Socceroo had turned up for a City training session.His Serie A club Palermo pulled out of the deal when the Premier League side refused to pay the $10 million transfer fee upfront.
With Bresciano a key part of the Palermo line-up, they needed the cash to replace him immediately and dropped out of the deal when City offered to pay in instalments.
Now though Eriksson has revealed new City owner Thaksin Shinawatra has given the go-ahead for a New Year spending spree which will include Bresh.
"I've spoken to the people upstairs and the news at the moment is good. I'm told that I can operate in January, so that is good," he said yesterday.
As well as Bresciano, City have also targeted out of favour Liverpool striker Crouch to bolster their attack after new signing Valerie Bojinov suffered a serious knee injury.
Eriksson wanted to buy the player over the summer but the tipped price tag of $30-$40million was out of the club's reach.
Now though Sven believes the Merseyside club will offload Crouch for just $20million, only $2.5 million more than they paid for him when he transferred from Southampton two years ago.
Robson Hunting More Aussies
SHEFFIELD United boss Bryan Robson is on the hunt for more Aussies to take to the UK after being delighted with his star buy of Dave Carney from Sydney FC.
Robson picked up Carney for a bargain $125,000 after the left winger shone in the Asian Cup."I was looking at it and thinking `who is this player keeping Harry Kewell out of the Australian team'?" he told AAP.
"Then I saw a few of the A-League games and the Australian national games and I was quite impressed with him."
And the Blades boss is so pleased with what he's seen, he's now on the look out for more.
"I think Australian football is improving all the time," Robson said.
"The international team is gradually getting stronger and improving and the A-League seems to be as well.
"I think Premiership and Championship clubs will always look across there because, not only do we rarely have a problem with the passports because of the background of Australia, but there is some real talent coming through there."
Robson admitted he is getting a shortlist drawn up of potential targets Down Under but denied Sydney defender Mark Milligan was among them.
Now he wants to size up possible buys ahead of the January transfer window before swooping to cherry pick the best.
"With my scouts and the contacts we've got over there we are looking at several players over there," he said.
"I haven't had the reports sent back yet, but we're monitoring some of the teams over there and I'm going to get them to update me around Christmas time.
"The chairman has got big connections on the business side with Australia as well as we've united with an Australian player now."
Carney, 23, initally struggled to find a place in the Sheffield squad after he arrived from Australia, but has impressed off the bench and got his first league game start from kick-off last week.
"The slight problem that we had was that Dave wasn't 100 per cent fit when he came so he had to build up to where the rest of the boys were," Robson told AAP.
"But he came in for the team on Saturday and did well and in the Cup games he's played very well when he's come into the team.
"I'm quite pleased but it's still taking him just that little bit of time to settle down and get to the pace of Championship football.
He added: "His attitude has been spot on. I think Dave will have a big part to play.
"In those wide positions, we haven't got a lot of competition in the midfield areas so they'll all have a big part to play with us."
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Monday, October 8, 2007
Sydney Away Trip
Sydney away trip in review
1. The game and chanting were awesome (always good to get one over Scum FC)
2. One chant went for 15 minutes
3. Caceras has to start for Victory for the rest of the season
4. Steven Corica has a fucking monkeys head
5. Ads and Chook are suffering a bad case of the yellow fever
6. Ads’ oriental friend was a bit of a BOBFOC (body off Baywatch, face off crimewatch)
7. Desmond was getting hit on by the hottest girl I have seen in ages (excluding Scarlett)
8. Chook loves the hard yards
9. We always play better indoor soccer hung over
10. Ads is a better juggler then Desmond and Chook (Ads 56, Desmond 48, Chook 4)
11. Ads and Chook cock-blocked Desmond with Trish
12. Trish is smelling the leather…sniff, sniff (or maybe it was all those grog bogs)
13. Ads has no idea of how to get from Pitt Street to Sydney Uni
14. Tomato and cheese toasted sandwiches went down like a treat
15. Ads loves Spectrum
16. Has Chook called Annie?
17. How many missed calls/emails/text messages has Chook got from Annie in 48 hours?
18. Ads spent more than $450 over two nights on alcohol
19. The Scarlett Johansen appreciation society is by far the coolest at Sydeny Uni (fuck the UN Club)
20. Heart is by far the shittest power of the Captain Planeteers
21. Linka is the Hottest of the Planeteers
22. Hentai is cool, if you’re looking for something to give your porn some variety
23. The second death star in Return of the Jedi was still under construction so there would have probably been all these sub contractors like plumbers, electricians and other tradies (as if storm trooper knows how to install a toilet). And along comes this group of crazy leftard militants and blows the fucking shit out of them. That’s like a million people there dying who were just minding their own business and trying to make some money from a government contract
24. Dave Burnett’s name sounds like a game show host
25. Chook is by far the hardest cunt I know
26. Desmond likes to hit women
27. Ads likes to sleep naked, and then go to the toilet naked, flash the cleaner, then walk around the room naked showing everyone how he shaved his balls
28. Dostoyevsky is a great ice breaker at intellectual dinner parties, you don’t even have to read what he writes. Just do the first 10 pages of Crime & Punishment and the last 5 and then imagine that the rest is kind of like the Fugitive with Harrison Ford except that there is no one armed psychotic killer, just a bum who thinks he’s Napoleon
29. Desmond was trying to suck himself off on the flight home for half an hour
30. Chook should not call women chicks as he is the only person in the conversation who is a chick
31. Trish should leave gay ass plays on words for when she reaches Parliament
32. Ads should at least try to hide his bonner when he dances with chicks
Can’t think of any more at the moment.
1. The game and chanting were awesome (always good to get one over Scum FC)
2. One chant went for 15 minutes
3. Caceras has to start for Victory for the rest of the season
4. Steven Corica has a fucking monkeys head
5. Ads and Chook are suffering a bad case of the yellow fever
6. Ads’ oriental friend was a bit of a BOBFOC (body off Baywatch, face off crimewatch)
7. Desmond was getting hit on by the hottest girl I have seen in ages (excluding Scarlett)
8. Chook loves the hard yards
9. We always play better indoor soccer hung over
10. Ads is a better juggler then Desmond and Chook (Ads 56, Desmond 48, Chook 4)
11. Ads and Chook cock-blocked Desmond with Trish
12. Trish is smelling the leather…sniff, sniff (or maybe it was all those grog bogs)
13. Ads has no idea of how to get from Pitt Street to Sydney Uni
14. Tomato and cheese toasted sandwiches went down like a treat
15. Ads loves Spectrum
16. Has Chook called Annie?
17. How many missed calls/emails/text messages has Chook got from Annie in 48 hours?
18. Ads spent more than $450 over two nights on alcohol
19. The Scarlett Johansen appreciation society is by far the coolest at Sydeny Uni (fuck the UN Club)
20. Heart is by far the shittest power of the Captain Planeteers
21. Linka is the Hottest of the Planeteers
22. Hentai is cool, if you’re looking for something to give your porn some variety
23. The second death star in Return of the Jedi was still under construction so there would have probably been all these sub contractors like plumbers, electricians and other tradies (as if storm trooper knows how to install a toilet). And along comes this group of crazy leftard militants and blows the fucking shit out of them. That’s like a million people there dying who were just minding their own business and trying to make some money from a government contract
24. Dave Burnett’s name sounds like a game show host
25. Chook is by far the hardest cunt I know
26. Desmond likes to hit women
27. Ads likes to sleep naked, and then go to the toilet naked, flash the cleaner, then walk around the room naked showing everyone how he shaved his balls
28. Dostoyevsky is a great ice breaker at intellectual dinner parties, you don’t even have to read what he writes. Just do the first 10 pages of Crime & Punishment and the last 5 and then imagine that the rest is kind of like the Fugitive with Harrison Ford except that there is no one armed psychotic killer, just a bum who thinks he’s Napoleon
29. Desmond was trying to suck himself off on the flight home for half an hour
30. Chook should not call women chicks as he is the only person in the conversation who is a chick
31. Trish should leave gay ass plays on words for when she reaches Parliament
32. Ads should at least try to hide his bonner when he dances with chicks
Can’t think of any more at the moment.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
How to write a match report
Taken from the boys at F365
Writing a match report is a highly technical skill, requiring a steady hand, the ability to keep cool under pressure and no little courage. In other words, it's like performing open heart surgery, being a Formula One driver or having sex on public transport.
These four activities share many other aspects in common. For example, you'll find that all four benefit from a little advance preparation. Similarly, it's always a race against time to get the job done without either embarrassing yourself or really disappointing someone else. But at least when you're writing a match report and you get it wrong, you're less likely to leave tell-tale bodily fluids smeared all over a wall.
Firstly, when writing a report, you need to remember that you're only allowed to use certain phrases when referring to certain teams. You would never write 'the Spurs defence, a steely unit, operated in almost telepathic harmony and was marshalled efficiently by the Baresi of the modern era, Anthony Gardner'. It's like writing 'Cristiano Ronaldo bravely rode a succession of tough challenges'. The public would laugh in your face. So think carefully.
The main trick to writing to tight deadlines, though, is to prepare some stuff in advance. After all, you can nick all the boring facts and stuff from other people. Here's a few examples of time-saving sentences, which can always be relied upon to be found in any match report - along with a few bad ones to show you what not to do.
We've used two teams selected entirely at random...
ARSENAL
Good Arsenal headlines...
* Wenger slams 'thugs who refuse to play football'.
* Wenger says young squad will mature and sweep all before them like Mini-Pop Panzer division.
* Arsenal foetuses delight friends and foes alike.
* Arsenal are greatest-ever team: Ajax's Total Football mob shit in comparison.
Arsenal headlines unlikely to be used...
* Humble Wenger sporting in defeat
* Wenger says team misses Henry's generous leadership and guidance
* Fabregas' downy baby hair makes opponents want to smell his head
Useful Arsenal pre-written sentences...
* Arsenal played their trademark football with a grace, confidence and joy that is almost transcendental; football which should have even the staunchest fans of their opponents standing up and applauding in delight, so privileged are they to be present.
* Arsene Wenger, the philosopher-poet of the leather spheroid, the genius who has transformed English football with his unique giant brain and his quixotic approach to football and pronunciation, is the Leonardo Da Vinci of our age.
* Cesc Fabregas bestrode this narrow pitch like a colossus, a footballing babe in arms with the brain of a 50-year-old seasoned warrior, a tiny god-like figure spraying passes like holy water about the worshipful cauldron of football that is his church.
* At this point Jens Lehmann, the possible weak link in the side, punched an opponent, then the referee, then gave a Chinese burn to a disabled woman in the crowd, before pulling out a pistol and yelling, "Come on then, you want some?" and falling to the floor, sobbing. The referee had no alternative but to show him the yellow card, putting a temporary dampener on the festival of football.
Arsenal pre-written sentence unlikely to be used...* Arsene Wenger, looking as ever like a bad-tempered, hairy walnut, said that today's opponents came to Ashburton Grove with a good game plan and executed it well, and he admired them for it.
NEWCASTLE UNITED
Good Newcastle headlines...
* Allardyce blasts 'incompetent' match officials
* Allardyce slams 'useless fookin' fat moron' referee
* Allardyce chokes on flaky pie crust
Newcastle headlines unlikely to be used...
* Allardyce says Newcastle will compensate England over Owen injury
* Allardyce blames himself for poor team performance
* It's just like watching Brazil, say Toon fans
Useful Newcastle pre-written sentences...
* Big Sam Allardyce, a steak-and-kidney pudding in a tight suit, spent the afternoon bellowing abuse at the match officials with steam coming out of his nose, a man driven by nature to trample all before him, like a Pamplona bull confronted by a naked Robbie Savage waving a red chiffon scarf.
* Little Mickey Owen's injury to his oversized thigh will have Steve McClaren's knuckles whitening and sheets yellowing in bed at night, as he wonders who, now, will bag the goals to take glorious England to the victory they need against Mauritania and the Cook Islands in this most fiendishly difficult of groups.
* Allardyce may look like a face drawn on the side of a crusty white loaf, but he has transformed the fortunes of this club with his hi-tech army of off-beat but effective specialist coaches. They include synchronised trampolinists, aromatherapists, sailing instructors and grief counsellors, along with an array of world-renowned experts from other fields, who come to the club regularly to give players lessons in beekeeping, charades, animal husbandry and stool analysis.
Newcastle pre-written sentence unlikely to be used...
* Big Sam Allardyce, perched daintily on the bench and nibbling nervously at a low-fat yoghurt, was notably reluctant to confront the officials whose job, he said, was already difficult enough.
Writing a match report is a highly technical skill, requiring a steady hand, the ability to keep cool under pressure and no little courage. In other words, it's like performing open heart surgery, being a Formula One driver or having sex on public transport.
These four activities share many other aspects in common. For example, you'll find that all four benefit from a little advance preparation. Similarly, it's always a race against time to get the job done without either embarrassing yourself or really disappointing someone else. But at least when you're writing a match report and you get it wrong, you're less likely to leave tell-tale bodily fluids smeared all over a wall.
Firstly, when writing a report, you need to remember that you're only allowed to use certain phrases when referring to certain teams. You would never write 'the Spurs defence, a steely unit, operated in almost telepathic harmony and was marshalled efficiently by the Baresi of the modern era, Anthony Gardner'. It's like writing 'Cristiano Ronaldo bravely rode a succession of tough challenges'. The public would laugh in your face. So think carefully.
The main trick to writing to tight deadlines, though, is to prepare some stuff in advance. After all, you can nick all the boring facts and stuff from other people. Here's a few examples of time-saving sentences, which can always be relied upon to be found in any match report - along with a few bad ones to show you what not to do.
We've used two teams selected entirely at random...
ARSENAL
Good Arsenal headlines...
* Wenger slams 'thugs who refuse to play football'.
* Wenger says young squad will mature and sweep all before them like Mini-Pop Panzer division.
* Arsenal foetuses delight friends and foes alike.
* Arsenal are greatest-ever team: Ajax's Total Football mob shit in comparison.
Arsenal headlines unlikely to be used...
* Humble Wenger sporting in defeat
* Wenger says team misses Henry's generous leadership and guidance
* Fabregas' downy baby hair makes opponents want to smell his head
Useful Arsenal pre-written sentences...
* Arsenal played their trademark football with a grace, confidence and joy that is almost transcendental; football which should have even the staunchest fans of their opponents standing up and applauding in delight, so privileged are they to be present.
* Arsene Wenger, the philosopher-poet of the leather spheroid, the genius who has transformed English football with his unique giant brain and his quixotic approach to football and pronunciation, is the Leonardo Da Vinci of our age.
* Cesc Fabregas bestrode this narrow pitch like a colossus, a footballing babe in arms with the brain of a 50-year-old seasoned warrior, a tiny god-like figure spraying passes like holy water about the worshipful cauldron of football that is his church.
* At this point Jens Lehmann, the possible weak link in the side, punched an opponent, then the referee, then gave a Chinese burn to a disabled woman in the crowd, before pulling out a pistol and yelling, "Come on then, you want some?" and falling to the floor, sobbing. The referee had no alternative but to show him the yellow card, putting a temporary dampener on the festival of football.
Arsenal pre-written sentence unlikely to be used...* Arsene Wenger, looking as ever like a bad-tempered, hairy walnut, said that today's opponents came to Ashburton Grove with a good game plan and executed it well, and he admired them for it.
NEWCASTLE UNITED
Good Newcastle headlines...
* Allardyce blasts 'incompetent' match officials
* Allardyce slams 'useless fookin' fat moron' referee
* Allardyce chokes on flaky pie crust
Newcastle headlines unlikely to be used...
* Allardyce says Newcastle will compensate England over Owen injury
* Allardyce blames himself for poor team performance
* It's just like watching Brazil, say Toon fans
Useful Newcastle pre-written sentences...
* Big Sam Allardyce, a steak-and-kidney pudding in a tight suit, spent the afternoon bellowing abuse at the match officials with steam coming out of his nose, a man driven by nature to trample all before him, like a Pamplona bull confronted by a naked Robbie Savage waving a red chiffon scarf.
* Little Mickey Owen's injury to his oversized thigh will have Steve McClaren's knuckles whitening and sheets yellowing in bed at night, as he wonders who, now, will bag the goals to take glorious England to the victory they need against Mauritania and the Cook Islands in this most fiendishly difficult of groups.
* Allardyce may look like a face drawn on the side of a crusty white loaf, but he has transformed the fortunes of this club with his hi-tech army of off-beat but effective specialist coaches. They include synchronised trampolinists, aromatherapists, sailing instructors and grief counsellors, along with an array of world-renowned experts from other fields, who come to the club regularly to give players lessons in beekeeping, charades, animal husbandry and stool analysis.
Newcastle pre-written sentence unlikely to be used...
* Big Sam Allardyce, perched daintily on the bench and nibbling nervously at a low-fat yoghurt, was notably reluctant to confront the officials whose job, he said, was already difficult enough.
Monday, October 1, 2007
GSE Away Trip I - Shitney
GSE, after demolishing top of the table No Idea (who clearly did seem to have 'no idea') 15-3, are heading to Sydney to support the mighty Melbourne Victory in the A-Leagues biggest grudge match vs Scum FC.
The game vs No Idea was perhaps the most one sided affair GSE has been a part of since the demolition it received at the hands of the mighty Bill Callenda's indoor team sometime in late 2003 early 2004.
The return of pacy hard nut Teuma gave the GSE some much needed steel in midfield, and more run between attack and defence. After a one sided first half littered with missed chances and butchered finishing, GSE put the foot on the pedal with a sparkling second half display. Highlights included desmond's 7 goals in 5 minutes and chook's hattrick in a minute at the death. "Jords' bro" (Nick, he goes by apparently) put in a mighty first half performance between the sticks showing the Magdalani superkeeper genes are not limited to the first of kin. Ads took away man of the match honours after giving the ref a royal RJ pre match.
GSE are now well clear (11 points) and in the top four ahead of Polonia a team against which GSE put in one of its more disapponting performances of the season. This is despite a handicap of -16 points after only two players paying rego on time and a 6 point penalty after a foreit.
The weekend ahead will provide the opportunity for GSE players to see if they can live up to their pop culture film heroes in hooliganism.
This may happen:
In any case the weekend will inclue jaegar bombs, a certain 'good wife', 'trish', 'white on rice', $5 dollar steaks, an 'accidental' visit to the Pleasure Chest, and what is simply known as "the great jump".
Fuck Off Sydney!
The game vs No Idea was perhaps the most one sided affair GSE has been a part of since the demolition it received at the hands of the mighty Bill Callenda's indoor team sometime in late 2003 early 2004.
The return of pacy hard nut Teuma gave the GSE some much needed steel in midfield, and more run between attack and defence. After a one sided first half littered with missed chances and butchered finishing, GSE put the foot on the pedal with a sparkling second half display. Highlights included desmond's 7 goals in 5 minutes and chook's hattrick in a minute at the death. "Jords' bro" (Nick, he goes by apparently) put in a mighty first half performance between the sticks showing the Magdalani superkeeper genes are not limited to the first of kin. Ads took away man of the match honours after giving the ref a royal RJ pre match.
GSE are now well clear (11 points) and in the top four ahead of Polonia a team against which GSE put in one of its more disapponting performances of the season. This is despite a handicap of -16 points after only two players paying rego on time and a 6 point penalty after a foreit.
The weekend ahead will provide the opportunity for GSE players to see if they can live up to their pop culture film heroes in hooliganism.
This may happen:
In any case the weekend will inclue jaegar bombs, a certain 'good wife', 'trish', 'white on rice', $5 dollar steaks, an 'accidental' visit to the Pleasure Chest, and what is simply known as "the great jump".
Fuck Off Sydney!
Thursday, September 27, 2007
GSE New Squad Poll
For the good part of this season, Green Street Elite Football Club have been playing with only just over half a squad
-------**
-----chook
--Ads-----Des
Subs: **
A recent outcry from midfield anchorman Ads stating that there were no competition for places left Captain Desmond no choice but to front up to the media. His response was that the reason the club had left one or two spots empty in the final squad was to give big names sufficient amount of time to transfer into the Division 7 Green League. It is rumoured that Des close friends Yossi Benayoun, Tal Ben Haim and Fat Keeper are all linked to a move to the glamour club.
Which brings us to this weeks poll. Who are the likeliest candidates to fill in the 4th and 5th playing positions of Green Street Elite?
If you would like to nominate yourself, or have another player nomination in mind please post them in the comments section.
-------**
-----chook
--Ads-----Des
Subs: **
A recent outcry from midfield anchorman Ads stating that there were no competition for places left Captain Desmond no choice but to front up to the media. His response was that the reason the club had left one or two spots empty in the final squad was to give big names sufficient amount of time to transfer into the Division 7 Green League. It is rumoured that Des close friends Yossi Benayoun, Tal Ben Haim and Fat Keeper are all linked to a move to the glamour club.
Which brings us to this weeks poll. Who are the likeliest candidates to fill in the 4th and 5th playing positions of Green Street Elite?
If you would like to nominate yourself, or have another player nomination in mind please post them in the comments section.
Bosnich Makes Comeback
Former Socceroo maverick Mark Bosnich has made a low-key return to football after playing a full match for Queens Park Rangers reserves. The former Socceroo was brought to the club by QPR manager John Gregory who he had worked with previously at Aston Villa. Incidentally, Gregory is currently under pressure at the club following a slow start for QPR in which the first team has won just two of their first seven matches.
Bosnich kept a clean sheet for QPR in a 2-0 victory over Barnet yesterday. The match, which was held behind-closed-doors, was an opportunity for QPR officials to assess some trialists but was also significant for another Australian.
Former Glory player Nick Ward starred in the match, scoring the first goal and setting up the second. Ward ravaged the Barnet defence in the first half after scoring a 15-yard shot after just six minutes. Eight minutes later, Ward then picked out Ben Sahar – who is on loan from Chelsea – with a through ball for the Rangers’ second.
It is unclear whether 35-year-old Bosnich is pursuing a return to first-team football but he admitted he was interested in a comeback after his involvement in UK reality TV show The Match, in which celebrities played football against former professional players.
At the time he said: “I wanted it to be my final farewell but I had such a good time and talking to the players made me have second thoughts.
"When people you look up to, like Bryan Robson, say 'Why don't you start playing again?', you have to listen."
Queens Park Rangers: Bosnich, Trialist, Bignot, Curtis, Shimmin, Rehman, St Aimie (Arthur 68’), Baily, Ward (Rose 75’), Sahar, Baidoo (Coyne 46’)
Subs not used: O’Brien
Middlesbrough ponder deal for free agent Aloisi
tribalfooball.com - September 25, 2007
The Mirror says Middlesbrough boss Gareth Southgate is ready to send out an emergency call for Australian striker John Aloisi as he faces a major crisis.
The Mirror says Middlesbrough boss Gareth Southgate is ready to send out an emergency call for Australian striker John Aloisi as he faces a major crisis.
Aloisi, 31, is a free agent after leaving Alaves, and is in currently in signing talks with German club Nuremberg.
But Southgate hopes the former Coventry and Portsmouth hitman will join Boro following injuries to Mido, Tuncay Sanli and Jeremie Aliadiere.
The Real Battle of Britain
And my favourite. If Pete Doherty can pick her up then I'm in with a chance (apoligies to Doherty cause I actually fucking love The Libertines).
The Buffy Girls
Slayers Sarah Michelle Gellar vs Eliza Dushku
vs.
Red Heads Alysson Hannigan vs Michelle Trachtenberg
vs
...and bad girls Emma Caufield vs Charisma Carpenter
vs
vs.
Red Heads Alysson Hannigan vs Michelle Trachtenberg
vs
...and bad girls Emma Caufield vs Charisma Carpenter
vs
Monday, September 24, 2007
Desmond's New Tactical Direction Part I
See below for a blueprint of the new tatical and technical direction of GSE.
Starring Kerlon and a thuggish defender, we see textbook attacking play, dubbed "the seal", which will be employed in the next GSE match, or whenever Rod returns to the fold. Chook should take inspiration from the tactics employed to stop "the seal's" progress next time he is in a one on one situation as last man.
More to come.
Starring Kerlon and a thuggish defender, we see textbook attacking play, dubbed "the seal", which will be employed in the next GSE match, or whenever Rod returns to the fold. Chook should take inspiration from the tactics employed to stop "the seal's" progress next time he is in a one on one situation as last man.
More to come.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
vs 
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
From Russia with Love
Mourinho loses job - reports
Eurosport | Wed, Sep 19, 23:00Sources at Stamford Bridge claim Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho has lost his job. It is not yet clear whether the Portuguese tactician was sacked or whether he left of his own accord.
Statement on Clubs Official Website:
CHELSEA STATEMENT
20.09.2007
Chelsea Football Club and José Mourinho have agreed to part company today (Thursday) by mutual consent.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
West Ham New Tactic
West Ham United have indeed failed in attempts to bring in their major transfer targets before the transfer window close, but may have the last laugh when they attempt to deploy their new tactic.
When the European Transfer Window ended on August 31 st, West Ham's squad was finalised and looked something along the lines of this:
----------------------------Green (Wright)
-----------------------------------------------------Walker 
With Lucas Neil as captain and a glory hunting Quarter Back, his sole job is to keep supplying the right wingers (Freddie, Faubert and Dyer) while Anton and Collins Sweep up any mistakes made. From there the wingers can either go for glory by taking a shot or assisting the left (Ethrington and Ashton) for goal. This is another breakthrough by Curbishely. This certainly concludes that Alan seems to have his plans for West Ham on the right track and any speculation that he isn't the right man for the job have been put to rest. I hope he continues to have success.
When the European Transfer Window ended on August 31 st, West Ham's squad was finalised and looked something along the lines of this:
----------------------------Green (Wright)
-----------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------
-------------Dyer
------------ Bowyer
------------Solano
---------------------------- -Camara
It seemed to me that in the beginning, Curbishley over indulged in right midfield players. Only after tinkering with the squad was then that i realised that Curbs was a 'football genius' according to Craig Foster if he mistook Curbs for Russian Manager Guus Hiddink.
The Reason why Curbs and Eggy have not gone out of their way to sign a solid left-back, left-winger and back-up striker is that they are ready to introduce the American NFL tested and tried Bootleg formation play.
The Bootleg Formation is designed to give the quarter back plenty of time to make a play as he is well blocked by his backmen. He can then make the decision to gain yardage by passing to his right wing runners or take it up himself.
By applying this tactic to west ham's line-up we should have something like this:
With Lucas Neil as captain and a glory hunting Quarter Back, his sole job is to keep supplying the right wingers (Freddie, Faubert and Dyer) while Anton and Collins Sweep up any mistakes made. From there the wingers can either go for glory by taking a shot or assisting the left (Ethrington and Ashton) for goal. This is another breakthrough by Curbishely. This certainly concludes that Alan seems to have his plans for West Ham on the right track and any speculation that he isn't the right man for the job have been put to rest. I hope he continues to have success.
Victory lost without Brazilian, says Tony Vidmar
NO Fred, no Melbourne Victory. That's the view growing legs in the A-League and it was yesterday backed by Central Coast's Tony Vidmar.
Vidmar believes Melbourne is struggling to reproduce its scintillating form without the Brazilian's wizardry.
Vidmar, who was sent off in the dying stages of Sunday's 0-0 draw against Victory at Telstra Dome, also claimed his red card for a foul on Archie Thompson was harsh.
Melbourne is undefeated but yet to record a win in four matches and Vidmar said the side was too reliant on its star strike pairing of Thompson and Danny Allsopp.
"A lot of people compare them to last season but they're not the same team," Vidmar said.
"They're missing Fred, who was a big factor for them and they don't have that flair about them at the moment.
"Leandro (Love) and (Carlos) Hernandez maybe haven't settled in -- they haven't done anything yet and that probably affects the balance of the team.
"If you're relying on Archie and Danny to produce, that's going to be tough, they don't really have a third player that can cause havoc."
And the problem will be compounded if Danny Allsopp fails to recover from his rib injury.
Vidmar yesterday had his arm in a sling, after injuring his shoulder in the tackle which led to his dismissal.
He faces a one-match ban and he's hoping the injury won't leave him on the sidelines any longer. "I won't know for a few days, might be a pinched nerve but at the moment it's very sore," he said.
"But I didn't think it was a red card, I felt at worst it was a yellow.
"I've seen Archie in the corner of my eye but I've decided to attack the ball and I think I won it before Archie got to it, so I felt it was a harsh decision.
"I was the last man but I attacked the ball and won it. I went into the air but Archie's crashed into me as well."
The league leaders' defensive depth will be tested to the extreme with captain Alex Wilkinson still on the sidelines, leaving Olyroo Nigel Boogaard to shoulder the responsibility.
Vidmar said this would be a good test for the younger brigade.
"Now we'll see how this week goes with injured players, hopefully all are available, but that's something that you'll go through in a team game," Vidmar said.
"There will be injuries and suspensions and players have got to come in and do a job.
"We've got key players out and now others have got to stand up and be counted."
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Making some money from people in Burkina Faso
DEAR ADS,
I KNOW THAT THIS MESSAGE WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE. I AM THE BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER IN BANK OF AFRICA (BOA), OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I HOPED THAT YOU WILL NOT EXPOSE OR BETRAY THIS TRUST AND CONFIDENT THAT I AM ABOUT TO REPOSE ON YOU FOR THE MUTUAL BENEFIT OF OUR FAMILIES.
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN TRANSFERRING THE SUM OF (USD$25) MILLION TO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN 10 TO 14 BANKING DAYS. THIS MONEY HAS BEEN DORMANT FOR YEARS IN OUR BANK WITHOUT CLAIM. I WANT THE BANK TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEAREST PERSON TO OUR DECEASED CUSTOMER (THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT) DIED ALONG WITH HIS SUPPOSED NEXT OF KIN IN AN AIR CRASH SINCE JULY, 2000.
I DON'T WANT THE MONEY TO GO INTO OUR BANK TREASURER ACCOUNT AS AN ABANDONED FUND. SO THIS IS THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU SO THAT THE BANK CAN RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED CUSTOMER.
PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO KEEP THIS PROPOSAL AS A TOP SECRET AND DELETE IT IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED.
UPON RECEIPT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL GIVE YOU FULL DETAILS ON HOW THE BUSINESS WILL BE EXECUTED AND ALSO NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE 30% OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED SUM IF YOU AGREE TO HANDLE THIS BUSINESS WITH ME? AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES THAT WARRANT ON THE PROCESS BEFORE THE FUND GET INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT SUCH AS TELEPHONE CALLS BILLS (ETC).
BEST REGARD.YUSUF MUSA
Dear friend,
I am very interested in your story. Wow! 30% of $25million! That's like $7.5 million!
I have plans to reinvigorate a football club in my country. You know football? Yah, my friends Desmond and Chook, are good football players.
Would you also be interested in investing your 60% in our great club called Green Street Elite? We are very much interested also in buying a new goalkeeper to replace our fat goalkeeper with German goalkeeper Jens Lehman?
We hear he is retiring soon and hope to bring him to our country to play. Also we wish to purchase young and upcoming star Titus Bramble to help marshall our defence and emulate our legendary Freestyler.
So yes, I am very much interested. Maybe you can give more details. I only have one concern - I am very much afraid of people cheating me. There have been a lot of silly people in my country getting cheated. How sure can I be? You said that 10% of the money ($2.5 million) will be spent on telephone bills? That is a lot. Are you sure your phone companies are not cheating you? There is a prepaid mobile phone plan in my country that only charges 35 cents/min.
Maybe you should consider that option so we can save more money and perhaps with $2 million left we can purchase another footballer - Kieran Richardson - you know him? Good player that one. So please you reply me, and then give me details then we can proceed.
Regards,
Ads, GSE
I KNOW THAT THIS MESSAGE WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE. I AM THE BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER IN BANK OF AFRICA (BOA), OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I HOPED THAT YOU WILL NOT EXPOSE OR BETRAY THIS TRUST AND CONFIDENT THAT I AM ABOUT TO REPOSE ON YOU FOR THE MUTUAL BENEFIT OF OUR FAMILIES.
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN TRANSFERRING THE SUM OF (USD$25) MILLION TO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN 10 TO 14 BANKING DAYS. THIS MONEY HAS BEEN DORMANT FOR YEARS IN OUR BANK WITHOUT CLAIM. I WANT THE BANK TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEAREST PERSON TO OUR DECEASED CUSTOMER (THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT) DIED ALONG WITH HIS SUPPOSED NEXT OF KIN IN AN AIR CRASH SINCE JULY, 2000.
I DON'T WANT THE MONEY TO GO INTO OUR BANK TREASURER ACCOUNT AS AN ABANDONED FUND. SO THIS IS THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU SO THAT THE BANK CAN RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED CUSTOMER.
PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO KEEP THIS PROPOSAL AS A TOP SECRET AND DELETE IT IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED.
UPON RECEIPT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL GIVE YOU FULL DETAILS ON HOW THE BUSINESS WILL BE EXECUTED AND ALSO NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE 30% OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED SUM IF YOU AGREE TO HANDLE THIS BUSINESS WITH ME? AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES THAT WARRANT ON THE PROCESS BEFORE THE FUND GET INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT SUCH AS TELEPHONE CALLS BILLS (ETC).
BEST REGARD.YUSUF MUSA
Dear friend,
I am very interested in your story. Wow! 30% of $25million! That's like $7.5 million!
I have plans to reinvigorate a football club in my country. You know football? Yah, my friends Desmond and Chook, are good football players.
Would you also be interested in investing your 60% in our great club called Green Street Elite? We are very much interested also in buying a new goalkeeper to replace our fat goalkeeper with German goalkeeper Jens Lehman?
We hear he is retiring soon and hope to bring him to our country to play. Also we wish to purchase young and upcoming star Titus Bramble to help marshall our defence and emulate our legendary Freestyler.
So yes, I am very much interested. Maybe you can give more details. I only have one concern - I am very much afraid of people cheating me. There have been a lot of silly people in my country getting cheated. How sure can I be? You said that 10% of the money ($2.5 million) will be spent on telephone bills? That is a lot. Are you sure your phone companies are not cheating you? There is a prepaid mobile phone plan in my country that only charges 35 cents/min.
Maybe you should consider that option so we can save more money and perhaps with $2 million left we can purchase another footballer - Kieran Richardson - you know him? Good player that one. So please you reply me, and then give me details then we can proceed.
Regards,
Ads, GSE
GSE Blogspot to take a new Direction
With a relatively slow start to the season cementing us to the bottom of the table, our commander and chief Des has begun his research into alternative methods in training to enhance our current form .
Last weeks method ended in failure with Desmond forced to concede defeat, finally agreeing with the World Doping Association that marijuana is indeed an illicit drug and not a performance enhancing substance.
This week, having experienced first hand through constant practice with his many lady friends. Our manager has made the discovery that an increase in testosterone can not only restore sexual function, muscle strength, and prevent bone loss; but a recent study has shown it can result in an increase in energy, sex drive and well-being.
With no access to the use of testosterone therapy(steroids) on account of Desmond's oustanding bill payment to his Dealer; we have been forced to utilize natural therapy by means of the stimulation of the brain to increase the receptors that increase the production of testosterone.
For that we now have the Scarlett Johansson award, where each round two female (not like the 'females' from Thailand) celebrities go head to head until one becomes the victor (called the Scarlett award on account that she does not compare to anyone). The winner will be invited along with Scarlett to our inuagural presentation night, where one GSE player will be awarded the Rodders Nani award (player of the season award). Votes to be made in the comments section.
First Match Up;
Road Trips Amy Smart versus Singer and Chick Flick Star Mandy Moore
vs 
Both have made an appearance on Scrubs:
Last weeks method ended in failure with Desmond forced to concede defeat, finally agreeing with the World Doping Association that marijuana is indeed an illicit drug and not a performance enhancing substance.
This week, having experienced first hand through constant practice with his many lady friends. Our manager has made the discovery that an increase in testosterone can not only restore sexual function, muscle strength, and prevent bone loss; but a recent study has shown it can result in an increase in energy, sex drive and well-being.
With no access to the use of testosterone therapy(steroids) on account of Desmond's oustanding bill payment to his Dealer; we have been forced to utilize natural therapy by means of the stimulation of the brain to increase the receptors that increase the production of testosterone.
For that we now have the Scarlett Johansson award, where each round two female (not like the 'females' from Thailand) celebrities go head to head until one becomes the victor (called the Scarlett award on account that she does not compare to anyone). The winner will be invited along with Scarlett to our inuagural presentation night, where one GSE player will be awarded the Rodders Nani award (player of the season award). Votes to be made in the comments section.
First Match Up;
Road Trips Amy Smart versus Singer and Chick Flick Star Mandy Moore
vs 
Both have made an appearance on Scrubs:
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